1. Two erotic poets have been commenting on my Daily Telegraph gardening blog. In the blog I said foraging for wild food may be unsustainable and asked for limericks-you may remember this theme from earlier efforts here. Famous poet Fiona Pitt-Kethley, said: “I live in Spain so pick many prickly pears and figs in Summer. Most wild trees seed everywhere so there is plenty for everyone. Why aren’t fungi mentioned above? I have always foraged these too both in the UK and Spain. I hope to be getting plenty of boletus soon. I also eat sea urchins raw while snorkelling and harvest seaweed, not to mention fishing.” But why no limerick? Horticulture Week writer and ex naked poet (really) Jack Shamash said: “I always forage for blackberries - they're much better than anything you can buy in the shops. Also, many houses have fruit trees that overhang the pavement, so I can get small quantities of delicious sugar plums and Victoria plums from across the road. We also have lots of squirrels and hedgehogs in our garden. I can catch them quite easily in a squirrel trap. I haven't been able to persuade my family to try the delights of barbecued squirrel, but if the recession really starts to bite...” Using this really is recycling. Talking of rude, Jonny Kirk, an old school mate, who is selling the Garden Expo show that the HTA is backing against Glee, also works on another trade show, ETO: Erotic Trade Only. Not much crossover there then.

2.       Saw John Walsh, Independent food/arts critic and Masterchef's the Professionals quarter final panel judge coming out of the Daily Mail/Evening Standard offices this week. 'Not very appetising' for the Indie?

3. I was writing a comedy bit about gardening Christmas books you might not want and came up with Alan Titchmarsh’s teenage gardening memoirs, ‘Not as green as I was grasslike’. Little did I know/imagine my surprise when: “Knave of Spades’ hit the shelves. Half price at WHSmiths – still £10 though.

4. Met Tony Kendle from the Eden Project today for the first time. He gave the lowdown on Gordon Brown's pledge to send hundreds of schoolkids via Eden into green jobs. See HW for details. Kendle was wearing a flowery shirt. Fashion fans- Peter Dawson had improved his dress sense at Glee btw.

5. Just back from Glee. Stayed in Yardley Travelodge, set behind a Macdonalds and a curry house eat as much as you like pub. Is Birmingham the ugliest city in Europe?

6. Britain's most valuable tree was mentioned by hort academic Geoff Dixon at an SCI conference 'Plants to the Rescue' this week. The tree, in Berkeley Square, may not be the correct one. Mainly because I identified it. Arb academic Mark Johnston said the tree had become a red herring in research to value Britain's urban forest.

7. Did seminar at Glee where 200 people turned up. Halfway through I realised I had no watch on and couldn’t really get out my phone to check time. Kept going for a bit then stopped 10 minutes early before the hour up. Thanks to Boyd Douglas Davies (Webbs), Carol Paris (Garden & Leisure), Caroline Owen (Scotsdales) and John Stanley (retail guru).

8. Gardener's World presenters have been at a seminar I held to try and put their real personalities onto the screeen. Alys Fowler, Toby Buckland, Joe Swift and Carol Klein were worried they were coming across badly. I tried elocution with Carol but gave up and we decided she should stick with the regional voice. With Joe, we decided to stick to the dopey mockney uncle persona. Alys and Toby were tougher. Alys was particularly worried about her clipboard judging-she said acting like Miss Jean Brodie ("the correct use of growing media") wasn't her. Toby felt saying "y'garden' allot while trying to smile at the same time was grating. Look out for big changes next series!

9. Went to Barton Grange the other day to meet IGCA. They all got off a barge and some schoolkids danced for them. Amazing to see garden centre people from Japan in north Lancs. The delegates all had a great time-a lot have been in touch-from Australia-Leigh Siebler, Hungary- Klara Biza etc. Took a pic of the £3,000 a go ornate bogs as a party of busdrivers walked in. Dodgy looks.

10. An RHS type has asked me not to quote her when she said that she was stressed by the recent consultation so was spending more time with plants. Guy in charge of allotments at Wisley latest to be made redundant.

11. Royal Parks half marathon latest. Training went ok in Keswick last weekend. Colleagues Magda Ibrahim and Bex Batty did Tress for Cities 5km last weekend, 32 and 42 minutes respectively. And colleague Gavin McEwan won his heat on Mastermind with Germanic languages. Can he be the first Scottish winner of the programme?

12. I note Garden News has picked up on gardeners spending more on their gardens this 29 Sept. Most garden sales and gains were made in March/April/May. The market has been pretty flat since then. So only four months late. Garden ‘news’? RHS The Garden did the same last month.

13. Judged Briggs and Stratton park of the year today at Groucho club. One judge asked what a Green flag was. The hundreds of parks professionals at the GreenSpace Green Flag conference in Manchester on the same day should be worried. I thought Heaton Park in Manc was the best of 35 entries btw.

14. RHS shows director Stephen Bennett has been vindicated when he suggested that Future Gardens might find it difficult to fund annual £300,000 bursaries for designers. Future Gardens haven't managed to fund the first year, with three designers not paid. Amuses me that many gardening writers went for the story they were fed about what a great thing FG would be when they were VIP'ed in to the St Albans garden this June. Only Magda Ibrahim at Horticulture Week questioned the price/value of the attraction.

1. Big news (broken by me) this week was the departure of Inga Grimsey from the RHS. Radio 4, Daily Telegraph, Mail etc, etc ran the tale that RHS is in crisis. RHS suggest otherwise of course. Interestingly, any 'name' garden type can't comment (or only comments in a boring way) because they are on the RHS payroll. I suggested to the papers they talk to some people who work for the RHS, perhaps by visiting a garden. Needless to say, this story eventually permeates down to garden types who pontificate on the subject, irrelevantly.

2. Went to RHS Wisley to September garden show. Queues for three hours off the A3. Quite annoying with a baby in the back of the car. Growers I spoke to such as Hyde lilies and John Hall heathers were happy though. Unlike the baby. Or RHS gardeners. Peter Dawson was there wearing a humdinger of a 'Come to Florida' sweatshirt. Not learnt from the Mr Fothergill's anorak episode.

3. Visited Guernsey this week for the opening of Blue Diamond's Le Friquet garden centre. Alan Roper has done a grand job of the donut-shaped centre. He's said that Hayes is copying in Ambleside. Roper will copy his own design, built by Hodges and Newspan, in Leeds. Guernsey is now known for its merchant bankers. One misheard Roper's name and guffawed. He thought it was 'groper'. I then mentioned my trip to Duke fo Northumberland's gaff Syon Park earlier that day. And how I once interviewed the Duchess while she sat and I stood. He made his excuses and left.

4. Also in Guernsey I visited two of the last five commercial tomato growers on the island. One is looking to retire. Amazing tasting toms. Beautiful ruin glasshouses. And business with UK supermarkets. Read more in HW/Grower soon.

5. Glee top 100 garden centres seminar is upcoming. Hope to see you there. Carol Paris, Boyd Douglas-Davies, John Stanley and Caroline Owen will speak on what makes you a top centre and what issues lie ahead.

6. The new Garden Retail magazine with the top 100 listing is out now. Email me at matthew.appleby@haymarket.com for a copy. A fantastic piece of work-sure to win the Garden Media Guild best article award again.

7. Was at Wyevale's long service awards at Syon Park last week. RHS bods Andrew Sells, Robin Herbert and John Ravenscroft dodged my q's on Inga. Nicholas Marshall was charm personified at the lovely home of the Duke of Northumberland. When I last interviewed his wife, I stood and she sat. Have I mentioned this before? This was a lovely event - the sort the old Wyevale didn't do. Insiders said things were good and Jim Hodkinson was bad history. Buyers said they were plant experts and that's why the growers liked them, as opposed to B&Q. I once watched the Devil Wears Prada on an improvised cinema screen outside the orangery at Syon when my Kiwi mate Justin lived there. Incidentally, saw DWP star Emily Blunt in resto in Wimbledon the other day. She had ravioli. Awfully thin, said my wife.

8. Tom Tree is now at Garden Bargains having left Pantiles. He asked me to revive this blog after a 10 day rest. I think Tom will make good TV material. It's time we had some new TV garden types. Who else would you suggest? Gavin McEwan is on Mastermind this Friday answering everything put in front of him asked on Baltic languages. Look out for him. Perhaps Gavin should be on TV more often? Or maybe Bob Flowerdew, who recently starred in the World Athletic Championships 800m. How about Marc Rosenberg? He'd prefer a lower profile I think. Maybe RC Smith, Steve Bradley, John Middleton and Stefan Buczacki on Grumpy Gardener programme?

9. Went to Woodcote Green garden centre the other day. It's there 50th anniversary and the place look busy and immaculate. Thanks. The baby liked the cafe too.