Bank holiday special.

1. Plant bingo anyone? Honda has a webcam pointing
at 24 real plants. Get your five and if they
bloom first, win £5,000 for an eco-friendly
holiday and £5,000 for charity of your choice:
http://tiny.cc/U4awU

2. Should  Future Gardens (the likes of Andy Sturgeon started building last week at Butterfly World Trust/National Gardens of Rose in St Albans) link with the RHS? The £500,000 annual cost of running Future Gardens could be unsustainable long-term and could take away top designers form Chelsea. FG could run at RHS Hyde Hall. But Future Gardens’ Therese Lang tells me she doesn’t need RHS to help as they have funding for at least three years.

3. Garden types cars 2.

Martyn Cox, Mail on Sunday garden writer – bashed up old Skoda.

Kris Kollins-HW/Amateur Gardening writer-Mini Metro

Oldham head of parks Steve Smith Peugeot 205gti 1.9 1992.

Garden designer Luciano Giubbilei-Vespa

Garden design judge Andrew Wilson-scooter and orange sports car

HTA director general David Gwyther-Mini and ‘estate car made in Swindon’ among his fleet

Which garden type has the worst car? Can they cash them in for £2,000 after the budget?

4. Read Joy Larkcom’s Creative Veg gardening the other day-way ahead of its time and could be template for much of what you read and will hear at Chelsea about potagers/designing veg into gardens etc.

4.5 Lord Clark of Windermere-man of the week. Forestry Commission chair On the board at Carlisle Utd - told me at the All-Party Horticulture Group launch of Save Our Science (the HW campaign to match-fund levy payments with Defra spend on horticulture research) that Jimmy Glass will be at Carlisle’s last match of the season against Millwall on Saturday. CUFC must win and hope other results go their way to stay in Div one. Glass kept Carlisle in the league 10 years ago by scoring in the last minute. Not that remarkable-except he was Carlisle’s goalie.

5. Dimmock-spoke to this week. Charlie says gardening TV has moved on since her day-not necessarily for the best: “I used to love Gardener’s World when it was really in depth. For instance if they did begonias you learnt everything about them. There was always something in there you didn’t know. I don’t know that TV wants in-depth things anymore. They don’t like us droning on about plants.”

6. GW producer Andy Vernon was on BBC Points of View on Sunday, answering criticism of GW. Missed it. Anyone see it?

7. GW on Friday- Joe Swift said something like “conifers have been out of fashion since 1974”. How do conifer growers/HTA who run National Conifer Week etc feel. Not happy.

8. I have a shed full of plastic garden pots that I am never going to use. Will it be OK to put them out with the recycling? By Kieran Cooke in The Times. Disingenuous I feel not to bother mentioning you can take them back to garden centres for recycling. http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/environment/article6193780.ece

9. At my wedding last week at Kew (well a pub near Kew) we asked for a garden makeover instead of normal presenters-toasters etc.
People's response was good. A 3 foot Australian tree fern came from Aus-based relatives Emma and Paul via Leicestershire's Seagrave Nurseries. Needs a lot of water and fleecing at -8C. Some friends, Anna and Jason, sent an olive via treesdirect.co.uk. Posh garden centre Chelsea Gardener, frequented by Joan Collins, Bernie Eccelstone and Julie Walters says smaller olives are selling better this year-big, expensive plant sales are down. Mainly we got National Garden Gift Vouchers, the Horticultural Trades Association's hardy standby sold at garden centres. But Bob, the head gardener at St George's Hospital and associates Pat and Simon gave us an IOU-they've promised to jackhammer the back yard and make it beautiful.

10. GARDEN ORGANIC, GREENPEACE AND RICHARD BRIERS OF ‘THE GOOD LIFE’ TEAM UP TO CREATE ALLOTMENT ON 3RD RUNWAY SITE last week in G20-style-meets favourite uncle event. Postponed because of Briers’ chest infection. The launch of the allotment will still happen, GO promise.

10 questions.

1. Speaking to Charlie Dimmock tomorrow about a Ground Force style transformation of the Shirley Warren Community Garden in Southampton was made possible thanks to Lottery funding. Where has she been? What would you ask her?

2. Dimmock has been doing Cuprinol promotions. Met Guardian Gardening ed Jane Perrone at Cuprinol launch at Kensington Roof Gardens last week. She’s thinking about creosoting her deck. A duck was there with 13 ducklings. Nice to see my call for garden writers to get out more is being heard. She’d like to meet Alys Fowler. They’d get on. Perrone won’t use her children on her blog. Here’s mine dressed as an Easter bunny on Walla Crag. Move over Julia Bradbury-v overexposed.

3. John Deere scholarship journalism student Graham Alderton from Kew asked me if it was ok to have a champers at the Cuprinol launch. Ahh sweet. I didn’t have one by the way. Is lunchtime drinking ok? Alderton was good value btw.

4. Is it ethical to sell review books on ebay? Jane Perrone gives them away.

5. All your favourite big names from The Sun will be on SunTalk too, including legendary agony aunt Deidre Sanders TV columnist Ally Ross, Gordon Smart and the Bizarre team (which Matthew Wilson used to work for apparently) and Sun gardening guru Peter Seabrook. Host is rabid ranter Jon Gaunt. Seabrook says in HW this week: “Could you think of a better way to dumb down what was the world’s finest showcase for UK horticultural skills than introducing plasticine plants? What next in this crazy world? An everlasting flower show of plastic flowers and plasticine plants to meet the life-suffocating health and safety requirements?"

6. Garden types' cars:

Bob Flowerdew-1980s fuel-guzzling BMW

Peter Seabrook-1990s Jag –drives from Chelmsford to Wapping –GB built

Graham Clarke-small Rover

Alys Fowler-has passed test but prefers fold-up Brompton bike

Wesley Kerr-mountain bike/horse and carriage

Gillie Westwood Garden Centres Association-Harley Davidson

Pat Adams GCA-Harley

Monty Don -Hummer

Matthew Appleby-Mondeo

Which are true?

7. Went to Chelsea Gardener garden centre open night. Joan Collins, Bernie Ecclestone and Julie Walters are customers. And a Coronation Street actress they couldn’t remember the name of.

Major Charles Fenwick owns it. He wears an eye patch having lost the peeper in Northern Ireland and was once equerry to Prince Philip (or Charles-can't remember). His brother Justin is more hands-on these days.

Middle East customers spend £800 on seeds. Only seeds and bedding are up. Colour is not in. Old faves sell best. The high-end customers want tradition, or what they’ve seen in mags. Do you have any celeb punters?

8. Prostitutes in Nottingham park charge extra for use of the springy chickens in the children’s area. A couple got stuck in the tube slide. A park in Sheffield has a dry stone wall around it. HLF is giving cash to Windermere-will they do to it what happened to Derwent Water which has new gaudy benches better suited to Morecambe?

9. Humour is a key ingredient of the relationships and Sunderland FC boss Ricky Sbragia frequently sends his Ewood Park counterpart jokey text messages. "The other day I discovered that Sam  [Allardyce] once used to be a gardener and enjoyed gardening," Sunderland's manager recalls. "I didn't know that, so I texted Sam with, 'Any chance of doing my gardening this week. Come and cut my lawn.' He sent me a rude, two-word one back. But we're all under pressure and I send little texts like that to break the tension." Do you send comedy texts about gardening to people? Better still, do you twitter about gardening. James Alexander-Sinclair does, unsurprisingly.

10. At Botanic Gardens Conservation International botanical artists exhibition at Methodist Central Hall in London Dan Pearson gave a short opening speech-he later mentioned Chelsea, Jubilee Gardens and the Observer. More later. Another top guest was Buckingham Palace head gardener Mark Lane-the garden opened for tours on Friday for the first time. 56 people have joined London gardens group It is drawing up a constitution-want all to communicate by phone or email-1000s potentially. See http://www.gardensmonthly.co.uk/ for my feature.

Bonus other guff:  

Gardening music-Sunday Express had a gardening CD on offer this week-Vivaldi, Beethoven, Brahms etc. Also cheap Groundforce CDs.
But do people garden to music? Guy on allotment listens to rugby on radio. I guess people use ipods. Some awards ceremonies use punning tracks, eg Westland wins and you get Go West, I Never Promised You a Rose Garden etc. Should gardening be in silence listening to birdsong etc?

Been watching London Marathon sponsored by Royal Parks, which gives me excuse to ask why is the commentary so bad? Steve Cram and Brendan Foster are ex top runners but seem unable to read a race. When someone makes a spurt, when someone is running well, how fast people are going etc. Wanjiro won Olympics by setting off fast-he did the same at London-each time Cram and Foster said for 26 miles he was going too fast. How patronising to suggest a pro runner doesn't know how fast he's going. You have to go fast to shake off opposition. Eleven finished within six mins of world record. No women did in a poor quality race marked by weak showing of Olympiads and ageing nature of leaders. Not mentioned by Cram and Foster who, along with all sports media, know marathons are one of few chance to give women equal showing. But the winners were miles off top quality pace. And the race was uncompetitive, unlike the men's where the BBC missed the key break because they were showing the wheelchair race. And I won't start on the medical encyclopedia mawkfest of the charity runners. Btw I'm doing the Royal Parks half marathon and will be writing about it. Today I ran round Wimbledon Common for 45 mins slowly after leaving wife and child having a pushchair stroll. I find I can sometimes do some creative thinking when running-today I just worried about money-family is expensive. And thought about writing this. Two weeks ago I did three long runs in the Lake District as well as three fellwalks carrying the boy. But knees are knackered. My dad has had 5 (knees). Could have been a contender otherwise he tells me.

Another top 10. They seem to come round very quickly.

1. A recent email: “Hi Matt, do you know if Carol Klein's book has been made to accompany a TV series on growing fruit or is it a stand alone volume?” Answer: It’s not stand alone. And it’s not part of Gardener’s World yet. Will the BBC tell the industry (like it used to) what’s going to be on to give garden centres a chance to stock up?

2. Peter Seabrook, The Sun’s gardening expert, says: “Cannabis growing is a massive industry — I believe it is one of the biggest cash crops in Britain, ..." The GYO boom is based on youngsters who learnt about gardening through heatlamps, male and female plants etc.

3. James May’s Chelsea garden will include plants and not just plasticine. The RHS say it is not just a gimmick and chief judge Andrew Wilson okayed it.

4. James Wong, Lila das Gupta, Rachel de Thame and Carol Klein are to be roving reporters at Chelsea. Rate is £XXX a day. Nicky Chapman, Andy Sturgeon are daytime presenters. Alan Titchmarsh and Joe Swift are doing evenings.

6. Chelsea’s 900-strong press-pack will be reduced this year as the RHS introduces wristbands to cut out the likes of Cakebaker mag editors who want to swan about and see the celebs. BBC is showing 11 hours coverage-only contracted for 8.5.

7. Garden writers keep saying they are tired of consumerism in gardening and people should buy less. Hmm. They are also bored of writing grow your own articles. Next big thing: community gardens, colourful gardens (cheerful) and fewer, cheaper garden journalists. And more celebs doing garden writing (eg James Cracknell on Kew in last saturday's Telegraph).

8. English Gardens and Gardens Illustrated. Almost the same mag these days.

9. Thought this was funny! From DIY Week's news in brief column,17.4.09:

Clarkson presents Gardeners’ World
BBC2’s Gardener’s World made a welcome return to our screens this month but with somewhat of a surprise for regular viewers. Eager to emulate the popularity of Top Gear, the BBC has brought in Jeremy Clarkson to ’soup up’ its flagship gardening programme. The series opener on Friday April 3 saw Mr Clarkson investigate the herbicidal properties of various lethal chemicals, along with a range of flame-throwers at the show’s new Birmingham site.

Done more than 10 this week. But some probably aren't v good. Off to Cardiff RHS show tomorrow on a bus with hort hacks. Hope they speak to me! Oh yeah, talking of hort hacks The Garden's Sally Charrett and HW's Kris Collins are joining Amateur Gardening. And Garden Media Guild is dropping its green award because everyone's green nowadays. Hope GMG gets its news award better judged.

1. Went to Soil Association press event at Acorn House, a trendy eco-restaurant in London's Kings Cross. No-one was there.

2. Bumped into garden designer Andrew Fisher-Tomlin on a train the other day. AFT told me Diarmuid Gavin's mag is closing down. It's a bit like Jamie Oliver's ego trip only it seems no-one buys it anymore.

3. Peat-free National Trust are on a witch-hunt to find which of their gardeners are buying peat-grown plants.

4. Lookalikes. Kiss's Gene Simmons and Olympic landscape designer George Hargreaves.

5. Dan Pearson's Charing Cross Maggies hospice garden looks great after taking a while to establish. I thought Thinkinggardens criticism of the garden was a bit unfair, though I could see how lazy London garden hacks had got carried away writing about its potent mix of Pearson, who everyone loves, and the worthy Maggies concept from landscape designer Charles Jencks, who is also a sweet guy.

6. Two stories I wrote. One: Eden Project head of hort Sue Minter resigns after comments about disabled gardeners. Two: Rachel de Thame and comments on how garden designers don't need to train. Both hit headlines. Did they kick off a debate among gardeners or garden writers? No. Wonder why?

7. Matthew Wilson's wife is soon to give birth to twins. The new C4 star married in Las Vegas earlier this year. He is only working two days at RHS. They must be keen to keep him.

8. Much criticism from seasoned hort types of revamped Gardener's World among some praise from garden centre types and HTA. Most people I called never watch the BBC gardening flagship. They might be pleasantly surprised by Alys Fowler's approach. I suspect the criticism is a hangover from Monty and because the presenting and research, for which the BBC uses non-TV trained people, is not exactly 'polished' and they think they can do better.

9. Saw ex-Garden Life publisher Seamus Geoghan at Eden Project Big Lunch launch last week. Plotting a comeback?

10. Was interested in the political blog story that hit the media last week. The 'unfounded smears' on Tory MPs were to be circulated on Labourite Derek Draper's blog. While gardening is just a bit of fun, and gardening blogs are mainly about silly ladies' cats and fantasies about gardening TV presenters, wouldn't it be fun if the power of the blog was used to push out some decent gossip on the gardening world? Just a thought.

11. Top quotes: Top allotment blogger Soilman ("You have win the honour of a link from my blog"), unnamed TV gardener ("Yes you are the best blogger Matt if you say so") , designer Wayne Hemingway ("If it's brown flush it down, if it's yellow let it mellow"), BBC PR ("Please can you remove it?"), writer Martyn Cox ("Matt's rant"), websiter George Bullivant ("it's more about you than anything else"), editor/blogger Jane Perrone ("It's just a bit of fun. Lighten up"). And the person who called me "racist" and "homophobic". Seeing them tomorrow. Sure will be ok.

12. Guide to growing your own. In 10 easy to read points. See all gardening sections. Even Dan Pearson's in the Observer. And Monty Don in Mail.

13. Ebay. Top sellers. Hessayon. Titchmarsh. Allotments. Several hacks have put Martyn Cox's admirable and fully publicised Kid's Wildlife Gardening book, given away at recent RHS Wildlife show, "up", flooding the market.

1. I was at an industrial tribunal for half a day last week. Settled out of court with high-profile garden-type admitting unfair dismissal. Could be more on this to come.

2. Which TV gardener is so overworked they accepted then declined at the last minute a high-profile column? Bad thing was the much-loved incumbent had already been shown the door.

3. Was at Clifton Nurseries last week for David McIlwaine sculpture launch. me: "I see the Duchy has moved out." Clifton: "Err, yes Daylesford has moved. They weren't making any money." Sign of recession etc. Architect Lord Rogers bought a £££ sculpture. His wife is River Cafe business partner with McIlwaine's wife Rose Gray. Annie Gatti wrote a piece on McIlwaine's home in Sunday's Times. Standard hack Pattie Barron was trying to tee up the same piece at the event. Great minds.

4. At the RHS Greener Gardening Show a poll showed 3/4 of exhibitors grew in peat. This follows BBC special the other week that decided peat use was bad and that B&Q spokesman Chris Beardshaw says gardeners can't be green if they use peat.

5. The BBC is standing by Chris Collins after his drug-use tale in the Sun, BBC says. Not seen him on TV since though.

6. Obama-balls. Fiona Reynolds, Hazel Blears at Big Lunch launch try and link to US president. As did Gardener's World on its belated return. The prog has gone magazine and included a snappy 'two good, two bad' piece. Alys Fowler thought Obama was cool for his grow your own PR while Joe Swift thought Chelsea 2008's wide use of green plants was topical. See my review at thinkingardens.co.uk. Anne Wareham asked me to write it 'snappily'.

7. At Big Lunch launch at RHS Lindley Hall celebs included Anneka Rice, Floella Benjamin, Dick Strawbridge, Peter York and Richard Reynolds. RHS CEO Inga Grimsey said there was too much concrete and paving everywhere these days. Hope Chelsea sponsor Marshalls weren't listening. Minister Hazel Blears  and National Trust CEO Fiona Reynolds both went on about Obama, irrelevantly. At the back Stephen Bennett and Bob Sweet plotted an unlikely 'Chelsea beats credit crunch' press release. BTW, Diarmuid says he is to blame for Chelsea getting 'bloated' he tells me. May be doing a Telegraph blog on Chelsea, but probably not after indiscreetly revealing that here. GCA CEO Gillie Westwood spotted celebs including Rosie Boycott, Ben Bradshaw, Ian Hodgson, Gordon Seabright, Bryher Scudamore, Tim Smit and Valerie Singleton, eating a Millie's cookie.

8. Did anyone see the BBC4 programme How Britain Got the Gardening Bug. Was a history of garding with Wesley Kerr good on old stuff, Jane Owen on miscellania and Ursula Buchan who said in her day you could only get olive oil from the chemist. Germaine Greer said she doesn't like gardening (yawn). Narrator Caroline Quentin was forced to say Monty Don is behind grow your own. Kerr said later that he thought the programme became a history of TV gardening, rather than gardening itself. Is gardening more than just what we see on TV?

9. Lookalikes. TV's Tim Briercliffe of the HTA and pop philosopher Alain de Botton.

10. Getting married at Kew on 18 April.